TEACH ME LOVE
Author - Manie van der Westhuizen
and owner of;
Mat516 Publishers,
South Africa
Copyright 2010 - Manie van der Westhuizen
Published by Mat516 Publishers publishing it on Smashwords at Smachwords
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“Scripture quotations taken from
THE HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION.
Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society.
Used with permission.”
Also Available
The Truth Will Set You Free
Breaking Free Of Addictions – Addicted To Love
In Afrikaans
Mens Wat Maak Jy Met My Hart
Published in South Africa by Mat516 Publishers,
Cellular Phone +27793170071
E-mail: manievdw@yahoo.co.uk
http://mat516publishers.yolasite.com/
International Standard Book Number
ISBN 978-1-4659-8287-2
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Table of Contents
Chapter 6 - ANNA-MARIE DON’T WORRY
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A true story how Jesus answered my prayers and taught me to love with his love. Bear in mind that Jesus is the only Mentor, that teach with emotion. God taught Abraham All-pervading Love when he instructed him to offer his son Isaac. (Genesis 22 verse 2) Then God said, “Take your son, your only son, Isaac, whom you love, and go to the region of Moriah. Sacrifice him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains I will tell you about.”
To teach me how to love with his love, Jesus knew he had to use someone whom I love. This someone happened to be Anna-Marie. Someone I loved even before I met her for the first time on earth. Like Isaac, Anna-Marie had no choice. Genesis 22 verse 10 to 12. Then he reached out his hand and took the knife to slay his son. But the angel of the Lord called out to him from heaven, “Abraham! Abraham!” “Here I am,” he replied. “Do not lay a hand on the boy,” he said. “Do not do anything to him. Now I know that you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your son, your only son.”
I had to offer my human Love for Anna-Marie to received omnipresent Love. When I wanted to touch her hand, Jesus seriously reprimanded me, when he said: “Manie you will not force your human love on her. You will love her as I love her, for she is mine. She will always be free.
Anna-Marie is free and reserves the right to love or hate according her own free will. To date she has never declared her love to me and we are not involved in a romantic love event.
At first, like all humans, I believed that humans love and Gods love are similar; I just wanted to embrace and cuddle Anna-Marie. Even I have forgotten that for years and years I asked God to teach me his Love; to teach me to love as he loves...
The first time I declared my love for Anna-Marie I told her and her family that I asked Jesus to build our houses close to one another. Well, I refused to tell them how Jesus answered me. Ok, I will reveal it now. Jesus said: “What do you mean by close, when you can travel at 300,000 Kilometers per second?”
As time passed by I experienced the same trial Jesus experienced daily from human love. Every time I told Anna-Marie I love you, I felt her retaliation, I felt the pain she experienced of rejection, because a thousand times she was told by another human, I love you, and a thousand times she was emotionally injured by the same human who said: “Anna-Marie, I love you.”
I felt the pain Jesus experienced daily, every time a human retaliates with the naturalia of human love on receiving Gods Love. I felt the pain every time humans rejected Gods love, just because they were hurt by other humans love.
Sixty days of torture was enough for me and I cried at Jesus feet; enough is enough, please Jesus stop teaching me to love as you love. I learned that it is only you, Jesus that can love with so much passion.
And then I discovered THE TRUTH about Omnipresent Love; ONCE YOU HAVE PRACTISED IT – YOU HAVE CRUISIFIED HUMAN LOVE.
Your love will never be human love again.
Manie van der Westhuizen
This is a true story how Jesus taught me All-pervading Love.
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Many years ago I listened to the conversation of two men. The one man asked the other man; “Please tell me how Noah gathered all the wild animals and locked them safely in the Ark?” The second man could not answer the question and neither could I.
Late that night this question haunted me and I could not sleep. I asked Jesus: “Jesus, may I sit at your feet while you give me the answer to this question.” And this is what Jesus told me: “Son, Noah never gathered all the wild animals. The animals obeyed my Father’s command.”
Couple of days later this two men were together again and I told them what Jesus had told me. They looked at me with confusion in their eyes. One of them took his Bible and tried to proof me wrong. He ticked with his finger on Genesis 6 verse 20 and said: “Manie you are on the ball,”and them he read the verse. Two of every kind of bird, of every kind of animal and every kind of creature that moves along the ground will come to you (Noah) to be kept alive.
That night I dwelled at Jesus feet and honored him. I cried before him to forgive me for I had killed many animals. I still remember how a desire to hold some wild animals in my hand entered my mind. I could not understand why wild animals are afraid of people, and then Jesus answered me.
“Until the twenty-seventh day of the second month in the year 1657 after the creation of the universe all human, animals, beasts of the earth and all birds of the air, every creature that moves along the ground and all the fish of the sea were friends. Go read Genesis chapter 9.”
I took my Bible and this was what I read from verses 2 to 4. The fear and dread of you will fall upon all the beasts of the earth and all the birds of the air, upon every creature that moves along the ground, and upon all the fish of the sea; they are given into your hands. Everything that lives and moves will be food for you. Just as I gave you the green plants, I now give you everything. “But you must not eat meat that has its lifeblood still in it.
Time passed by until July 2006 AC, two months after my divorce, and I went and live on a farm in the Northern Cape closed to Douglas. My house was on the banks of the Orange River. One morning about three hundred wild monkeys passed my house. I wanted to be their friend but they were afraid and ran away when they saw me.
On the farm were lands full of peanuts and the workers were gathering them and filled big bags with these peanuts. I asked them to deliver 10 bags with peanuts at my house.
They thought I was crazy for all the other farmers were shooting and killing these monkeys, yet I wanted to feed them. Within three weeks the monkeys accepted me as their friend.
The next three months, August, September and October 2006 was miraculous, yet I was a dying man desperate in need of a third Coronary blood vessel Bypass Operation, which was conducted on the eight day of November 2006.
I expressed thanks to Jesus, for he has fulfilled my desire to hold wild animals in my hand. One night Jesus told me: “Manie, I am teaching you love; to love with passion; to love with my love, for you have experienced human love. Human love always ends with humiliation. Human love always ends with separation. Human love always hurts. For human love always enrich oneself.”
O, how I experienced love the next day when my monkey friends arrived. Lesson 1 – you cannot give love. You cannot give love to enrich yourself. No, I had to wait for my monkey friends to come and receive my love.
When the little baby monkeys sit on my shoulder and I walked around the house between hundreds of monkeys, I suddenly realized their mothers trust me with their children. They were not afraid when I touched them. They were not afraid to open my hand, to take a peanut from it. They were not afraid to follow me inside my house.
One night at Jesus feet he told me: “I have died on behalf of every human, yet I cannot give them my love. I cannot force them to take my love. They have to come to me and receive my love.”
Time passed and it was time for me to go, to go to Bloemfontein for my heart operation. My monkey friends visited me for the last time. Somehow they knew. When I looked into their eyes I identified pain.
I named my favorite of the young ones “Stompie” for his tail was bitten off during a quarrel with another. One by one the monkeys left, but Stompie stayed, until he was the last. When his mother was away more than hundred meters, he took a peanut from my hand and ran after her.
I did not want to go for the third operation, but Jesus had different thoughts and he won.
Since my divorce I lost interest in any human relationship with another woman. For I know that human love hurts; it separate and end with humiliation.
Until sixty-three days ago when a woman by the name of Anna-Marie walked into my life and I was caressed by Love – Monkey Love.
When I wanted to touch her hand, Jesus seriously reprimanded me when he said: “Manie you will not force your human love on her. You will love her as I love her, for she is mine. She will always be free, free as your monkey friends were.”
It took Jesus sixty years to teach me love. To love as Jesus love, therefore friend don’t wait for Jesus to give his love to you, just go to him and take his hand, walk with him and received his love.
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As a human we all know that love hurts. We love one another just to enrich ourselves. Therefore once there is no benefit in loving another human, love ends in separation.
God is love, is a well known saying by humans, but do people really love God? I always struggled to understand, if Jesus paid the full price for all humans, why are there so few people that are saved and will enter the kingdom of God?
Well, let us investigate Monkey lesson 2 – Not all three hundred monkeys loved (trusted) me enough to sit on my lap - it was only the young and small ones.
One day while my monkey friends spend some time with me it really hurts me to discover that it was only the young ones who trusted me enough to sit on my lap. I recalled in my mind the words Jesus has said when his disciples prevented the children to be with Jesus. Luke 18 from verses 15 to 17 – People were also bringing babies to Jesus to have him touch them. When the disciples saw this, they rebuked them. But Jesus called the children to him and said, “Let the little children COME TO ME, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I TELL YOU THE TRUTH, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.”
Suddenly I understood why only a few people do enter the kingdom of God, simply because most people do not want to COME TO ME (JESUS) and receive the kingdom of God. The big monkeys did not want to come to me; therefore they feast only on the leftovers the baby monkeys left behind.
I never understood my late brother –in – law when he said: “My house is open for those who come to me and visit me. If you do not want to come to me and visit me feel free to stay away.” I also believed he was selfish, even thought he was hurt by people. I was wrong.
Today I knew God is love, but if you do not go to him and receive his love you will always be without his love. It does not mean that his love is less for you. You determine how must love you gather from God.
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The Answer
A man went to a barber shop to have his hair and his beard cut as always. He started to have a good conversation with the barber who attended him.
They talked about so many things and various subjects. Suddenly, they touched the subject of God.
The barber said: "Look man, I don't believe that God exists as you say." "Why do you say that?" asked the client.
"Well, it's so easy, you just have to go out in the street to realize that God does not exist. Oh, tell me, if God existed, would there be so many sick people? Would there be abandoned children?
If God existed, there would be no suffering nor pain I can't think of loving a God who permits all of these things."
The client stopped for a moment, thinking, but he didn't want to respond so as to cause an argument. The barber finished his job and the client went out of the shop.
Just after he left the barber shop he saw a man in the street with a long hair and beard (it seems that it had been a long time since he had his cut, and he looked so untidy).
Then the client again entered the barber shop and he said to the barber: "You know what? Barbers do not exist." "How can you say they don't exist?" asked the barber. "I am a barber and here I am."
"No!" the client exclaimed. "They don't exist because if they did there would be no people with long hair and beard like that man who walks in the street."
"Ah, barbers do exist, what happens is that people do not come to me."
"Exactly!"- affirmed the client. "That's the point. God does exist, what happens if people don't go to Him and do not look for Him? That's why there's so much pain and suffering in the world."
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Chapter Three: God Suffered Pain
God suffered pain, when we humans rejected him. We were deceived by Lucifer, and we demanded our own freedom of choice. We did not want to obey God, no; we wanted to be our own god, we wanted to love with our own egotistical love.
Ninety-nine percent of my life, to date, I loved God like all humans do; I loved God with my self-centered love. In other words I love God for all the things he has done for me, but God is not our genie, he is our Creator. Even worse I loved all humans with an arrogant love.
Remember my desire to hold some wild animals in my hand. O, how Jesus fulfilled my desire, and then; one night Jesus told me: “Manie, I am teaching you love; to love with passion; to love with my love, for you have experienced human love. Human love always ends with humiliation. Human love always ends with separation. Human love always hurts. For human love always enrich oneself.”
Little did I know what it takes to love as Jesus love? Until seventy days ago when Anna-Marie walked into my life I was happy just to be alone – alone with only Jesus at my side. Gone was the thought that Jesus is the only mentor that teaches with feeling.
On the 11th day of September I wrote the following in my Book “THE TRUTH WILL SET YOU FREE” in Chapter ten; God allowed Anna-Marie to walk into my life for he knew that no other woman will ever effected my emotions to understand WHAT LOVE IS so dramatically. And through Anna-Marie God made me perfect in love by forcing me to remove my fears.
Thanks to Anna-Marie I experienced God’s perceptions of Love for the first time in my life. My perceptions of love were different from God’s perceptions. All my thanks to Jesus who granted me to date more than fifteen years of extra life, for he made it possible for me to hold the hand of Anna-Marie, just for a little while. This does not mean that Anna-Marie should have the same emotional feelings for me. She reserves the right to love or hate me. She is free and I hereby do not force her to love me.
The essentalia of love is – to obey the commands of the one who is loved. Therefore for me to declare my love for Anna-Marie it simply request that I obey her commands. Allow me to give the following 2 examples;
1, Today a week ago while sitting next to her in the presence of her family, I had the desire to hold her hand. Anna-Marie was not at ease with that idea and pulled her hand from mine. Then Jesus taught me this valued lesson for I wanted to hold her hand. This is what Jesus told me at that moment: “Manie, if you force her, to allow you to hold her hand, you are a rapist. At that moment I understood the essentalia of love and I immediately obeyed Anna-Marie’s command.
2, The next day we were sitting on the same spot and we were talking to her sister’s daughter. Anna-Marie asked me if she could go and help her sister to prepare food for lunch. ow, Anna-Marie fascinated me, for without me saying a word she new I wanted her to stay a little longer. Believe me I do not worry about food when I am in the presence of Anna-Marie.
She obeyed my command. (Thanks Anna-Marie this one I will always remember). Within minutes Jesus reprimanded me and I felt like a bad, bad guy. I asked Santie, her sister’s daughter to go and have a look and see if her mother was busy preparing the food. Anna-Marie immediate stood up and walked to the kitchen. Then Jesus gave me a hiding: “Manie if you love Anna-Marie, you must obey her commands. God’s love and ours is best described by Apostle John. (1John 4 from verses 7 to 21.)
Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us; he sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love; not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.
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Chapter Four: Omnipresent Love
Today seventy five days since that first moment my eyes saw Anna-Marie, believe me I still struggle to find words to explain how I felt at that moment. Was it love at first sight? Human love – no, I had enough of human love – human love already separated me from all women.
All I know since that moment Anna-Marie is omnipresent in my mind. Omnipresent, something I only understood since last night. God is Love; God is Omnipresent – for sixty years of my life on earth it did not mean anything for me – but last night at Jesus feet I was embraced with Gods Love so powerfully and for such a long period I queried Jesus; Why, why tonight, and then Jesus answered me: “My love is omnipresent. Not how you think – my love is surrounding you always – no, my love and omnipresent is one; omnipresent (all-pervading) is my love. I am always with you.”
I am always with you – and since I can remember I always prayed and prayed; “please Jesus come and visit me.” Sometimes I felt his presence, sometimes not; every now and then I heard his voice, now and then, not. For years and years I told people God is love; God is omnipresent. God is always with you. And I prayed and prayed, begging God to be with me – what a fool I am - I cried, asking Jesus to forgive my stupidity.
Only then I understood why I just wanted to be with Anna-Marie, for omnipresent is my love. Did I declare my love to Anna-Marie? Yes I did with little success, simply because Anna-Marie was also hurt by humans love; she also separated herself from men. For men are bad.
Will I ever forget the first time Anna-Marie offered me her lips to kiss her goodbye? Will Jesus ever forget the last kiss Judas Iscariot gave him? I felt the pain Anna-Marie experienced from Homo-sapiens love, I felt the thorns she put on her lips to protect her from human - men’s love. I felt the pain kissing a prickly pear. Immediately I kissed her a second time, I just wanted to remove all the thorns on her lips. I felt ashamed of being a man. I heard the general sacred song of women rumbling in my mind, “Love hurts - hurts too much” Human love always ends with degradation.
Distance and my bodily imprisonment together with poor financial availability handicap my omnipresent love for Anna-Marie, handicapped me to be in company with her. I treasured the five times she traveled to Ermelo since we met. Just to be in her company charismatically enhance the essentalia of omnipresent love.
Yet, I cried every time I saw the emotional panic it evokes in Anna-Marie when I attempt to explore on my love for her. I felt her pain every time she valuates my perception of love with all her past experience with human love. I felt her judgment and resentment to men who injured her in the name of love.
I felt her pain when she opened her heart just a little fragment by saying, “I lived in Mozambique for two years – and it was hell.” I felt her pain when she showed me her different signatures. I felt her pain when she told me she wants to change her surname back to her maiden surname.
I felt the pain of being imprisoned inside a human body, the inability to move with spiritual speed. I felt the pain of separation. I felt the pain every time Anna-Marie left Ermelo. I felt the pain of not being close to her.
I felt the pain of happiness – happiness in my heart for it is impossible to experience Omnipresent Love without hatred for human love. Happiness in my heart for Anna-Marie experienced the naturallia f human love.
I felt the pain of desire - a desire for Anna-Marie to set her mind to go to Jesus and ask him to teach her All-Pervading Love - and my mind spins back again.
For years and years I asked Jesus to teach me love, to love with his love. And for years and years Jesus tolerantly taught me love, but I was to stubborn, stubborn like only humans can be to learn. Allow me to repeat something I wrote in the first chapter; one night Jesus told me: “Manie, I am teaching you love; to love with passion; to love with my love, for you have experienced human love. Human love always ends with humiliation. Human love always ends with separation. Human love always hurts. For human love always enrich oneself.” And then Jesus broke my stubbornness, seventy six days ago the moment my eyes saw Anna-Marie.
On the 11th day of September I wrote the following in my Book “THE TRUTH WILL SET YOU FREE” in Chapter ten; God allowed Anna-Marie to walk into my life for he knew that no other woman will ever effected my emotions to understand WHAT LOVE IS so dramatically. And through Anna-Marie God made me perfect in love by forcing me to remove my fears.
Thanks to Anna-Marie I experienced God’s perceptions of Love for the first time in my life.
I have learned to appreciate the omnipresent love of Jesus.
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Thirty years ago I wanted to write a book about my mother, well, although I spend my first thirty years with my mother, I stop writing on the first page, because I lacked information.
All I knew about her was all the good things she did in her life. Today I realized that I can write that single page again for there is no better way to compare the difference between Human Love and All-Pervading Love.
My ears never hurt a filthy word out of my mother’s mouth. My mother never raised her voice in anger. My mother never discriminated another human. My mother never complained, not even about the unfairness of life. She never asked anybody to help her with her daily household tasks.
I still remembered every time whenever I started to work at 2 o clock in the morning, she woke me up at 1 o clock with a freshly made warm meal, even after my marriage, while my x was sleeping in bed.
She repaired my clothes and cleaned my shoes, but x told me: “her mother told her never to clean any other person’s shoes for they will kick you with those clean shoes.”
In my life I had never seen my mother’s underwear after my marriage I asked my eldest sister: “Did mom wear underclothes?” My sister laughed at me and told me how my mother always washed her underwear early in the mornings when she was alone at home and covered it on the washing line with blankets or towels.
One day my mother helped the church with some money raising act, she was in the coffee bay making coffee and tea for the customers. She called me and gave me a cup of coffee. The best ever in my life, made with milk and not with water, this was my first cup of coffee made with milk ever, unaffordable at home. I went back and said: “thank you Mom” with appreciation deep from my heart. She look at me and smile, will I ever forget that smile?
In my life experience with my mother I gladly announced that my mother not only experienced human love, but she was well educated in omnipresent love. She surrounded not only my father but all her children with her love.
Mom and dad were great mentors and teachers; they taught us children by leading the example.
This was the foundation they gave me; 1 Corinthians chapter 13 from verses 4 to 8 – Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres. Love never fails.
My mother obeyed God; Genesis 2 verse 18 – The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” She was the perfect suitable helper for my father and his children.
Moments before her death she trusted me her baby with a whispering voice while she was surrounded by her husband and other children: “Son I am dying.” Mind to mind without a word I answered her: “It’s ok Mom, tell Jesus I love him with all my heart.
She looked at me and smile, will I ever forget that smile; it stayed on her face even after the undertaker removed her body.
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Chapter Six: Anna- Marie Don’t Worry
Monday, November 08, 2010
Today, Monday, November 08, 2010, exactly four years ago, I had my third Triple Coronary Blood vessel Bypass Operation at the Universitas Hospital in Bloemfontein.
A little while ago I told Sonia and Bernie at SonBesi Properties, Ermelo, lifting my hand to show them where I lived with my daughter on the 4th November 2006; just opposite SonBesi around the corner in a newly build flat.
Sonia was shock when I told her I challenged God on the 3rd November 2006 to provide me with transport;f it was his will for me to go to Bloemfontein. She responded with a question; “How can you challenge God?” Bear in mind I was once again a dying man not capable to drive to Bloemfontein for an operation. I was tired of being a useless sick dying man not capable to walk thirty meters without rest and medication. I really wanted to die and go home, but God has his own way.
Before the sun has set on that day God has arranged people from Nelspruit to take me to Kimberley to assist them with some work in Douglas about a hundred kilometers west of Kimberley.
The next day, the fourth day of November 2010, we left Ermelo. Late that evening we arrived at Kimberley and spend the night at the Formula One Hotel.
The next morning, the fifth day of November 2006, we traveled to Douglas where I helped them to complete some work. The afternoon, after lunch we returned to Kimberley and they took me to the Kimberley Hospital. Thereafter they returned to Nelspruit.
Early morning on the sixth day of November 2006 I was transferred from Kimberley Hospital in an ambulance to the Universitas Hospital. Within minutes after my arrival an Angiogram was conducted on me and a Balloon Pump was implanted inside my Aorta to assist my heart pumping my blood through my veins and arteries.
Two days later, on the 8th November, it was operation day. The next three days I remained in ICU (Intensive Care Unit) and it was hell.
Early morning on the 11th day of November 2006 my heart started to operate without the help of machinery. Anna-Marie isn’t this great? Four years ago on your birthday God granted me some extra time on earth.
Anna-Marie isn’t it a miracle, today exactly one Hundred days ago you walked into my life on earth. On this day at this moment I am writing the final chapter of this book. JUST FOR YOU. (My simple gift to you for your Birthday on the 11th day of November 2010)
Anna-Marie don’t worry – it is Gods will for me to be in your life – not as a human lover – not to hurt you under the name of love.
But to teach you this simple philosophy – that when a man really obey Jesus commandments; Jesus will love him and teach him to love as he loves.
My Love is patient, my love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs. My Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres. My Love never fails.
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Two days ago, while hovering at Jesus’ feet, he told me the following: “Manie for one hundred and ten days I opened your mind to love with my love. A Homo Spiritus Love; A love not affected by Homo-sapiens destructive intentions mainly to enrich oneself. A love that fulfills my commandment as recorded in; 1 Corinthians 10 verse 24: Nobody should seek his own good, but the goods of others.
Manie, go and love all humans as you love Anna-Marie. Don’t judge them by their wealth, their clothes, their age, their colour; Love their Homo Spiritus within, for they are mine. Go seek their wealth; go take care of them, for they are mine.”
(1 Corinthians 3 Verse 16); don’t you know that you yourselves are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit lives in you? If anyone destroys God’s temple, God will destroy him; for God’s temple is sacred,
AND YOU ARE THAT TEMPLE.
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About the Author
Teach Me Love:
A recording of my personal life experience with my Saviour, Jesus Christ. I do not promote any religious organization, nor do I have any attention to claim this book as a religious work of art.
It was my biggest privilege in life to utilize my time to read the Bible from Genesis Chapter 1 verse 1 to the end Revelation Chapter 22 verse 21. Thereafter I closed the Bible, took the hand of my Redeemer and walked with him. To hold and obey his commands is the essentalia of Life.
I am honored to know that my life was extended to date with more than fifteen years. Three Coronary Bypass Operations during these fifteen years were all for the good and worth it for granting me the opportunity to write this book.
JUST FOR YOU.
http://mat516publishers.yolasite.com/